So I recently got the *insider* scoop that a certain online publication has a “hate boner” for me. The only possible reason for this is because of the content of my writing, so, naturally, I just need to make my novels even MORE erotic. That way, I could turn that “hate boner” into a, well, regular boner I suppose. Which, now that I think about it, wouldn’t actually require any physical transformation of the metaphorical erection itself. Rather, the heightened eroticism will manipulate the underlying emotion which arouses such vigor in the first place. Thus, I will tempt such carnal delight with my sheer facility with the words that talk about the things that, uh, people do… when… when they get a room… and the private stuff… of the thingies… and chalices… and yeah… Fuck.
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